Bob Smith: bowler, auto mechanic, prosecutor, fisherman . . . senator?
** ADVANCE FOR SUNDAY, JAN. 15 ** This undated photo provided by NBC Universal shows actor Sam Waterston, left, as district attorney Jack McCoy in a scene from the "Birthright" episode of "Law and Order." The influence of two hit television franchises, "CSI: Crime Scene Investigation" and "Law & Order," are so convincing as imitations of life in the criminal justice system that some legal experts worry they're distorting the expectations of real jurors. (AP Photo/NBC Universal, Virginia Sherwood)
SSG Roy Sims, 9th Communication Bn.
A few months back, when former U.S. senator Bob Smith first announced his intention to run for his old seat this year, I set up a “Bob Smith” Google alert for myself. That way, whenever Smith was in the news in a significant way, the story would magically appear in my email inbox.
Pretty clever, eh?
Turns out, Bob Smith is everywhere! All over the country! All over the planet! Making news, day and night. Well, either that, or there are way more Bob Smiths out there than you might imagine. And if you want to keep up with our Bob Smith, the real Bob Smith, you have to sort through a whole lot of lesser Bob Smiths in the news. Need proof?
In just the past few weeks alone, Google has informed me of the following:
Jan. 10: Wayne County (Ga.) prosecutor Bob Smith is taken to task for uncivil behavior.
Jan. 12: Fishing columnist Bob Smith of Northumberland, England, reports, “The festive period was super for fishing the still waters, while unfortunately the rivers have carried a lot of water and prevented me fishing for grayling on the Tweed.”
Jan. 13: Bob Smith, a mechanic in Kalamazoo, Mich., gives his local TV news station some advice about coping with potholes. The damage to a car, he notes, can cost upward of $1,000.
Jan. 16: Bob Smith of St. Augustine, Fla., complains to his local newspaper about absenteeism on the Anastasia Mosquito Control Board.
Jan. 17: Bob Smith of Northumberland, England (another one!), participates in a backyard rubbish cleanup effort.
Jan. 20: Bob Smith, president of Geranium Street Floral in San Mateo, Calif., touts something called the “hybrid living wall” in a press release, explaining that it’s constructed of “artificial boxwood hedge, real decorative rocks and California succulent plants.”
Jan. 21: Sports photographer Bob Smith shoots a high school basketball game for the Clarion-Ledger newspaper of Jackson, Miss.
Jan. 22: New Jersey state Sen. Bob Smith, a Democrat from Middlesex, promotes a bill to dedicate $200 million a year to preserve open space in the state.
Jan. 24: Bob Smith, president of Austin, Texas-based Sage Advisory Services, offers this investment advice: “The consensus among market strategists predicts 2014 will continue along the trajectory that was established in the second half of last year; namely, modest but gradually improving U.S. and global economic growth rates with tame inflation. In other words, we can reasonably expect economic conditions that are not too hot and not too cold, but just right.”
Jan. 24: In Colleton, S.C., Bob Smith attends a party for financial donors to the Colleton Center, an arts and civic center.
Jan. 24: Macomb County (Mich.) Commissioner Bob Smith gives a rousing speech about the state of the county.
Jan. 26: Bob Smith, a reporter for the Associated Press, reports that the National World War II Museum in New Orleans plans a gallery commemorating the work of men and women who saved stolen cultural treasures from destruction by the Nazis.
Jan. 26: On a website for boxing fans, writer Bob Smith notes, “I was one of the many boxing fans who a year and a half ago watched the travesty of the 12-round unanimous decision win for Tim Bradley against Manny Pacquiao in their fight in June of 2012. It was difficult not to be angry and think of boxing as fixed, because the decision was so atrocious. I even made a resolve not to watch boxing that lasted an entire week.”
Jan. 27: Royston (England) Mayor Bob Smith attends a ceremony to mark Holocaust Memorial Day.
Jan. 27: Bob Smith, a winter league golfer in Mearns, Scotland, places sixth in a weekend tournament.
Jan. 28: Bob Smith, owner of the Carondelet Bakery, the oldest bakery in St. Louis, discusses his pending retirement on a local TV news show.
Jan. 29: Bob Smith and other members of the Big Bear Lake (Calif.) Department of Water and Power agree that the officers from 2013 will be the officers for 2014.
Jan. 30: Bob Smith reminisces in the Lakefield (Minn.) Standard about a 30-year-old bowling accomplishment, finishing second in the 1984 American Bowling Congress Championships national tournament.
Jan. 30: Bob Smith, a softball player on a team called the Stonewalls in Naples, Fla., gets three hits.