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Letter: Possums are fer huntin’

I was a might surprised when I seen an editorial in your fancy newspaper ’bout possums (“Repulsed by possums? Think again,” Monitor, April 4).

Now, possums is a subject I know a little somethin’ about. I have to disagree with this here writer cuz the only good possum is a dead possum. My cousin Flora was known in the hollars for her yumeee possum stew. Me and Daddy used to go possum huntin on nights when the moon was full. Them things are down right gnarly lookin’. That writer is plumb crazy if he plans on lettin’ that critter hole up in his house.

But then, you people up here have some pretty crazy ideas ’bout a lot of things. Like what’s this I hear ’bout makin’ Loudon Road three lanes? Now that’s a real thigh-slapper if ever there was one. Oh well, I guess in the “Live Free or Die” state, even possums get a pass. Me, I got a nice collection of possum tails I’d like to show ya.

Signed, Not From These Parts.

ELAINE KELLERMAN

Concord

Legacy Comments5

Appears our fearless editor might have a bottle of Granny's rheumatism medicine stashed in his desk drawer. Not sayin', just sayin'...

You flatlander you. If you don't like our Loudon Road improvement then you can just git and drag those nasty possum tails behind you. But on a side note... I like squirrel meat the best though. (Don't tell anyone I'm suffering from Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease though)

Elaine, If'n yood like to come over here yonder fer a gud dinner at the fancy eatin' table, I'll put on sum nice clothinz & smell reel purty fer ya. Maybe laytir we cud go fer a swim in the cee-ment pond. Wuddya say, sugar plum? -Ernest T Bass (Jethro Bodine's cuzzin, twice removed & once evicted)

Somethin’ ‘bout that in-vie-ta-shun don’t smell raht. As Good Ol’ Boy Gen. Buck Turgidson said: “Mr. President, I’m beginning to smell a big fat commie rat.”

Wonderful! Thanks, Ms. Kellerman.

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