Hopkinton lacrosse coach was ‘the most generous man’
Lacrosse was Doug Maynard’s first love.
He also loved coaching the boys’ lacrosse team at Hopkinton High School and history and Double Stuf Oreos. He loved scoring goals and the play A Christmas Carol and his golden retriever and working as a stockbroker and rooting for the Celtics.
And Lorrie Maynard, his wife of 23 years, was his greatest love.
“I was smart enough to never ask him to (choose between me and lacrosse),” Maynard
But Doug died Nov. 1 of an apparent heart attack at the age of 65, and yesterday Maynard and her family spilled over with stories about a man who simply and truly loved life.
“I pretty much just assumed he was going to live until he was 90,” his nephew Joe Dammann, 23, said.
“I know,” Maynard said, with a little laugh. “That was my plan.”
Doug’s plan was just to enjoy each day as it came. Maynard said her husband’s father died when Doug was in college, a loss that stuck with him as he got older himself.
“That gave him a very good sense of, life is uncertain,” she said. “You have to have some fun along the way. He had a great balance of planning for the future, we don’t spend all our money today, but let’s have some fun and let’s spend some money on something that is really special. . . . Don’t get me wrong, there were lots of things that we wanted to do. But he would be the first to say that he had a great life, and he was very happy.”
Fun for Doug, who played college lacrosse at Wesleyan University, was often on the field with a stick in hand. Maynard said this was to be Doug’s last year as a player, but he had planned to continue coaching at Hopkinton. The couple lived in Dunbarton and did not have any children, but their niece Katie Dammann, 26, said Doug began coaching Hopkinton sports when she and her brother were young students there.
Maynard was instrumental in bringing varsity lacrosse to Hopkinton High School and had been the boys’ coach there for the last several years, leading the team to a state championship in 2011 and to the state finals in 2012.
“He was willing to do anything and everything to get it out there and get kids interested,” Maynard said. “A couple of years ago, we had to go line the field one Saturday morning. They had a game, and they didn’t have the field lined.”
Hopkinton High School Principal Chris Kelley said the boys’ soccer team paused for a moment of silence in Maynard’s memory at their quarterfinals last week. Many of those players transition to lacrosse and Maynard’s team in the spring, he said.
“I know the kids had a great deal of respect for him,” Kelley said. “He had a really strong program here.”
Athletic Director Dan Meserve called him “one of the founding fathers of the whole Hopkinton lacrosse program.”
“He stressed sportsmanship,” Meserve said. “He was a great teacher of the game.”
Joe Dammann played on his uncle’s team when he was in high school. He always wore No. 12 on his jerseys – his uncle’s number.
“He just had a very infectious work ethic,” he said. Doug “basically got people to come out on Sundays and work.”
As much as Doug loved scoring goals, that work wasn’t all about winning.
“His coaching involved worrying about what schools would (his players) have a good fit in, and were the seniors being nice to the freshmen. . . . It was more than just lacrosse, let’s learn it, let’s play it, let’s win it,” Maynard said. “It was, let’s learn how to be nice to each other. He was trying to build more than just lacrosse players.”
Doug got involved with Hopkinton schools because of his niece and nephew, but he was more than their coach. He organized an extensive Easter egg hunt on his 12-acre property for them each year, wrote birthday poems with silly rhymes – “ ‘Happy birthday to Katie, the birthday queen,’ that’s how they always started,” Katie Dammann remembered – and took them on trips around the world.
“The most generous man I ever knew, with everything he had,” Joe Dammann said. “Time, money, everything.”
Maynard’s family laughed at the way Doug rejected his sister-in-law’s berry pie one year. They laughed at his wife’s memory of how they met – in a bar watching a Celtics game, where Doug “was sitting where I wanted to sit, really, right in front of the TV,” Maynard said. They laughed at the memory of Doug’s own booming laugh, a trademark of his, and his loud voice bellowing from the sidelines of the Hopkinton lacrosse field.
But Maynard was quiet for a minute when she mentioned the sound of her husband’s voice in the voicemails she still has saved on her phone from when he was still so vibrant, so charismatic and so fully alive.
“It’s sad that he’s not here with us now,” she said, softly. “But he liked the life that he was living.”
(Megan Doyle can be reached at 369-3321 or firstname.lastname@example.org or on Twitter @megan_e_doyle.)