Printed on her T-shirt was “Gold Star Family.” Engraved on the wall nearby was her son’s name, just above the date he was killed by a roadside bomb in Afghanistan.
Melissa Farmer, 44, stood near the new Global War on Terror Memorial at the New Hampshire State Veterans Cemetery in Boscawen, a stone tower unveiled Monday to honor those who have died since Sept. 11, 2001. Spc. Justin Pellerin, an Army infantryman from Concord and Farmer’s son, is one of them.
She posed for a picture, but she didn’t smile.
“I know a lot of other generations have had to wait to be remembered, particularly the Vietnam-era veterans,” Farmer said. “It’s nice that we have this here and now. Our sons are remembered.”
Memorial Day at the New Hampshire State Veterans Cemetery was a day for remembering.
Some remembered quietly. A woman sat on the damp grass and rested against a headstone. A family stood in front of a grave marker; as the mother wiped tears from her face, her young daughter reached over and hugged her legs. Seated in a wheelchair, an old man with a “Disabled American Veterans” patch on his sleeve raised his hand in salute when the national anthem played.
Some remembered with ceremony. Dignitaries – Gov. Maggie Hassan, U.S. Sen. Kelly Ayotte, U.S. Reps. Annie Kuster and Frank Guinta – made speeches. A teenage boy wore a suit with his basketball sneakers. Taps played.
“This solemn day has turned into a commercial day of fun, vacation and sales,” Lewis Chipola, deputy commander of the New Hampshire Veterans of Foreign Wars, told the audience at the cemetery’s annual ceremony. “The true meaning has been lost by many Americans.
“It’s up to us – the veterans and the people who care and know – to educate our younger generations, so they understand the true meaning of Memorial Day.”
Some remembered with their loved ones. A man in a uniform held a baby in a onesie printed with little green dinosaurs, smiling for a photo. Mike Scardina, an Army veteran who served from 2009 to 2013, walked through the memorials with his curly-haired daughter. His mother was one of the donors who helped make the new Global War on Terror Memorial possible. His partner, Ben Doane, wore an Army T-shirt.
“It is a day of reflection and gratitude,” Scardina said. “Stop and remember.”
“It’s important to see kids here,” Doane added, looking down the path at the little girl.
And many remembered loved ones lost. Army Staff Sgt. Ryan Pitts stood tall near the new memorial. He survived grave injury in the Battle of Wanat in Afghanistan in 2008 and received the Medal of Honor from President Obama, but he spoke to the crowd mainly about the nine men who died that day.
“My brothers left a mark on me, and everything I go out and do, and everything I touch, and everything I see and experience, I know is because of them,” he said. “And I try to carry that torch. That’s the fire they lit inside of me. And I owe it to them.
“I think tomorrow is how we honor their legacy.”
Farmer’s son was just 21 years old when he died. From what she knows, Pellerin helped bring ammunition to fellow soldiers who needed it during a firefight. When the call for help came in, his friends told Farmer her son was the first one to jump in the Humvee. The group escaped the fight with no lives lost, she said, until the road back to their base.
“All celebratory, all excited, ‘Yeah, we got out,’ ” Farmer said. “They hit an IED on the way.”
Pellerin received the Bronze Star, the Purple Heart, the Good Conduct Medal and the NATO Service Medal, according to Monitor archives. Farmer didn’t mention those honors. Instead, she recalled how her son was fiercely competitive in board games and bowling. She talked about how he would have loved his 2½-month-old niece, whose middle name is “Justine” for her uncle.
“There’s a lot of children that are going to grow up hearing about their uncles, their brothers,” Farmer said.
Merle Dustin, 92, of Contoocook can tell stories about her husband, Dr. Eben Dustin. She was part of the Cadet Nurse Corps in Boston during World War II, while he served in the Army. He worked as a flight surgeon during the Korean War and, later, as the director of medical services of the State Department and Foreign Service.
He was among the last U.S. Embassy personnel evacuated from Vietnam after the fall of Saigon; his wife said he was treating a patient who had a heart attack. He and a group of remaining Marines chopped down the trees in the parking lot, so a helicopter could land there for the patient’s gurney.
Since her husband died in 2003, Dustin has attended every Memorial Day at the Boscawen cemetery. With her gray nurse’s cap perched on her head, she looked around at the cemetery and smiled.
“This is a place of memories,” she said. “Absolute memories.”
(Megan Doyle can be reached at 369-3321, mdoyle@cmonitor.com or on Twitter @megan_e_doyle.)