Most couples fight from time to time. Those that fight fair try their hardest to keep their kids out of the fray – whatever their conflicts, they try to agree on what’s best for their children. When quarreling parents are unable to put their kids first, families are likely to fall apart.
America today is a family falling apart in a raging conflict over values, priorities and principles. We fight about guns, taxes, health care, schools, abortion, patriotism, police practices, religion, the size of government, and safety nets versus personal responsibility. These battles grow ever more heated, with no apparent solutions that will satisfy both sides. We live in states dubbed “Red” or “Blue” (or sometimes “Purple”); we latch onto media outlets that reinforce our prejudices; and we hold out unreasonable expectations that the next election will solve everything. Or else we pull into ourselves and adopt an attitude of cynicism and hopelessness. Just like a marriage headed for the rocks.
And our kids – America’s young people? How can we possibly avoid making our children innocent victims of our seemingly intractable national family feud? How can we bestir ourselves to do what couples who fight fair manage to do – put their squabbles aside when it comes to what’s best for the children?
Here’s one idea. Form a task force made up of trusted individuals from a broad spectrum of political constituencies – liberal and conservative, rural and urban, white, black and brown, religious and secular – and headed by one or two people who are universally respected, such as George Mitchell (who helped bring Catholics and Protestants together in Northern Ireland), Colin Powell, Diane Sawyer, George Clooney, or possibly Michelle Obama and Laura Bush. My ideal candidate, alas, would have been Fred Rogers.
The members of this task force would have to be people who accept the reality of compromise and share a determination to promote the well-being of children from all corners of the nation and all socio-economic levels.
Let this group be tasked with one over-arching goal: to recommend concrete steps to ensure that America’s children are given what all of us, from all persuasions, believe is vital – the opportunity to rise to their potential, to be the best they can be, and to learn how to live with one another in a spirit of harmony and mutual respect.
Now imagine that this task force were to recommend that America devote as much of its resources to the well-being and opportunity of our children as we now devote to the well-being of our older citizens. What we might see is a proliferation of government, nonprofit, volunteer and faith-based initiatives that make sure that every child is well-nourished, healthy and cared for in pre-school programs staffed by adequately paid and trained staff, of the quality and experience we demand of those who care for our aging parents. The goal would be to have every child prepared to begin formal education with a solid foundation.
The next phase of this “Opportunity Challenge” would involve creating the highest quality schools and after-school programs, based on the best of existing models. This would, indeed, be expensive, perhaps equaling what we now spend on Medicare for those over 65. But think of the waste of human potential and the crises in our communities that stem from our neglect of those children we used to call “under-privileged.” Think of the social costs of under-funded, poorly equipped schools, and urban and rural neighborhoods where kids and teenagers are left in the “care” of television, video games or street gangs. Think of the benefits of training under-employed men and women as members of a domestic “army” of public servants able to mentor children and youth, to inspire them to achieve, and to help them navigate the difficult years of childhood and adolescence.
We must put resources into training our teachers, police officers and youth workers so they can counteract the pitfalls of low expectations, child abuse, bullying and mental illness, and help empower children and youth to find reward in positive and life-affirming pursuits – physical, mental and spiritual. Here again, the cooperation of public and private sectors, of foundations and faith-based organizations, is essential.
Our high schools and colleges would have to become part of this movement through reforms that enable young people to pursue the Opportunity Challenge through learning activities that promote collaboration, creativity and enterprise, rather than to continue to emphasize compliance and competitiveness. But I see that I am falling into the trap of pre-empting the policy outcomes that I hope will emerge from this blue-ribbon task force.
So let’s remind ourselves, instead, of the one unpleasant but necessary component of the Opportunity Challenge: It will cost money. Lots of money. Those who have benefited most from our current economic and political system will have to contribute a significant portion of their excess wealth to support access for every American child to a brighter, healthier, safer and more neighborly future.
This is not just a wish. It is a moral imperative. The future of our democracy and our American belief in ourselves as a land of opportunity depends on taking action. It’s for our kids and for ourselves. It’s for the neighborhoods we want our grandchildren to live in.
It’s what Mr. Rogers devoted his life for.
(Robert L. Fried of Concord is a retired educator who is now a writer, gardener and tinkerer. He can be reached by email at rob.fried@gmail.com.)