The first time Doris Cousens met the man who would become her husband, she didn’t like him.

“I’m Southern and he had a dry Maine sense of humor that I did not appreciate,” Doris said, laughing. “I thought he was sarcastic and just really didn’t appreciate his humor at first.”

But her stance toward Lyman Cousens quickly softened.

“I just came to appreciate his sense of humor and got to appreciate the kind of person he was,” she recalled from the Boscawen living room the couple shared for some three decades. “I found out he was a really good person who cared, and he was sensitive.”

Small in stature but grand in spirit, Lyman Cousens moved to Concord in 1989, the same year he met Doris. He quickly got involved in a host of volunteer work in the capital region and in local government in Boscawen, where the couple relocated around the time they married in 1992.

Cousens died on April 24 from complications of heart disease. He was 87.

In addition to his humor, friends said they will remember Cousens for the genuine approach he brought to his volunteering, public service and relationships.

“If I wanted one word to describe Lyman, it would be ‘authentic’, which you can’t always say about a lot of people,” said Dr. Bob Wilson, a member of the Snowshoe Club, a Concord social group to which both men belonged. “But he was the real deal. He was honest. He was just such a wonderful person. You just met him once and you just instantly liked him and he liked you.”

Cousens grew up in Cape Elizabeth, Maine, and attended Bowdoin College, where he made a lifelong group of friends who call themselves the “Band of Brothers.” Together, they went on regular golf trips across Europe and the U.S., which Doris said were some of Lyman’s fondest memories.

After college, Cousens settled in Boston and went into banking, which ultimately brought him to New Hampshire. He raised his three children in the Sunapee area and served as president of First Citizens National Bank in Newport, before moving to Concord in 1989 following a divorce.

Doris had recently relocated from North Carolina when a neighbor who worked for the Boy Scouts – for whom Lyman volunteered – connected the pair. Though it may not have been love at first sight, Doris said she steadily warmed to his dry sense of humor, penchant for telling uproarious stories and care for his community and others.

Shortly after moving to Boscawen, Cousens got involved in the town’s Old Home Day celebration, running its golf tournament for many years. He also chaired the town’s zoning board, served as a member of its conservation commission and was named Boscawen’s Citizen of the Year in 2013.

Current Boscawen Select Board member Lorrie Carey first met Cousens in the early 1990s when he came into her flower store. They would go on to work closely together on a range of town matters.

“He was such a valuable resource,” Carey said. “It’s really hard when someone brings so much to the table.”

Carey said Cousens’ legacy will live on through the flagpole that stands in the center of the roundabout on Rt. 4 at what Carey refers to as the “gateway to Boscawen.” The flag, installed in the fall of 2020, required a fundraising and organizational effort, which Cousens led.

“He is the reason why we have that American flag,” Carey said. “He was the driver behind that.”

Among his many volunteer endeavors, Cousens drove elderly residents of the area to their medical appointments for many years through the Friends Program. He ultimately convinced his friend Bob Wilson to participate as well.

“These people would say, ‘Oh, you’re taking me today. Where’s Lyman?’” Wilson recalled. “Because he was everybody’s favorite.”

“Lyman Cousens was a wonderful, unique person who was forever giving of himself,” Wilson added.

Doris Cousens said that spirit was imbued in him by his parents and grandparents.

“That’s just who he was,” she said. “He got a lot of joy from helping people in Boscawen, in Concord, in his communities, or in Newport. In any community in which he lived, he tried to make a difference.”

Jeremy Margolis can be contacted at jmargolis@cmonitor.com.