This June marks 20 years since I graduated high school in Gilford, barely made it across that stage and had absolutely no idea what was coming, except a one-way ticket to California four days later. In the two decades since, I’ve built businesses, become a mother of two, survived a stroke during brain surgery that left me severely blind and rebuilt myself more times than I can count. I’ve had the kind of life that doesn’t follow a plan and I’m grateful for it.
But if the version of me that exists today could sit down with the girl waving her diploma, ready to go live, I’d slip her this list instead.
This might make you or your family uncomfortable. And that’s my point.
- It’s better to cry in a pile of money than a pile of 1-ply toilet paper.
- Stop considering people who don’t consider you.
- Your brain is a liar and that fear is just bad math.
- Go to trade school. Skip the four-year university if nobody’s paying for it. Or better yet, take a gap year and go see the world first.
- The person you marry or have children with is one of the most crucial decisions that will affect your life forever.
- Shut up. Keep your goals and dreams to yourself because everyone wants you to do better, just not better than them.
- Pretty privilege gets you invited. Your personality keeps you in the room.
- Perfect one skill. The rest are hobbies until you make enough money.
- Make sure your insides match your outsides.
- Move. Leave New Hampshire. Go adventure. You can always go back home.
- You can’t take everyone with you. Friendships end. Relationships change.
- Fix the leak before you fill the bucket.
- If you truly want to excel, stop caring about other people’s opinions.
- Get comfortable being uncomfortable.
- Your net worth is your network. You are the sum of the five people you spend the most time with. Choose wisely.
- Do not over-explain yourself to anyone. You owe nobody an explanation.
- Experiences will forever be superior to anything materialistic.
- Learn to enjoy your own company. Seriously.
- Consistency with a side of confidence will take you further than talent ever will.
- Always choose you. Always.
Bonus: Don’t get fat. And yes, this is partly about vanity, but more importantly your body is the only one you’ve got. Water it daily.
If even one thing on this list made you stop and rethink everything, my job here is done. Class of 2026, go give us something to talk about. Class of 2006, I hope you’re still dancing.
Courtney Nolan-Hunter is an executive editor and lifestyle attaché based in Southern California. She grew up in Gilford. Find her at courtneynolan.net.